It's not about you.

Naturally the Lord has been WRECKING my heart over the past few months. It’s been the absolute best... don’t get me wrong though- it’s been hard to have my sin thrown up in my face- but EVERY TIME He unearths the idols I so foolishly root in my heart, even though it hurts, I can’t help but rejoice that He loves me enough to continue to make my heart reflect more of His own. 

Since I last posted I have graduated college.

Let’s just stop there for a moment and rest on that “simple” statement- I GRADUATED COLLEGE. Apparently only 6% of the world right now holds a college degree. So all of you college-degree holders out there, and those who are currently in college- let’s all take a second... and maybe even much longer than a second and LET THAT SINK IN and praise the Lord for providing that opportunity and go DO SOMETHING with it. 

So what am I doing? I’m serving at Summer’s Best Two Weeks until the end of August. I’ve had the blessing to lead a bible study over the summer here at camp. We’ve been working through 1^st Corinthians... and no matter what passage we are looking at, the same exact theme surfaces every time: “It’s not about you.”

My B-STUD girls. They encourage me so much by the ways they are deeply pursuing the Lord- at whatever cost... because guess what? HE'S WORTH IT. 

It’s not about you. It’s not about me. It’s about Jesus. PERIOD.

Seriously though... think of how big of a game changer that would be if we all really lived like that. For example:

• I’m insecure. It’s not about you and how you feel about you- it’s about me in you. The truth is that you are completely unlovable. There is nothing in you that draws me to you- it is for me, through me, and because of me that I love you. While you were still a sinner, I died for you. Your job is to be outrageously and indescribably loved- for no reason at all. When you fail to “live loved,” you fail to live out the beauty of the gospel: it’s not about you, so BE loved my beloved.
• I desire ____ (fill in the blank). It’s not about you and what you want- it’s about you realizing you already have more than enough in me. Stop waiting on a guy, a job, or whatever the next thing is and realize that you already have me, and I am everything.  
• I’m so tired and no one is noticing all the ways I’m serving. Daughter, your statement is a complete reflection of your heart. If you were truly serving for me and only me, it wouldn’t bother you that “no one is noticing.” It’s not about you. “If you are trying to please people, you aren’t a servant of Christ (Galatians 1:10).” The real heart issue here is that you don’t think that I’m enough, because if you did, you wouldn’t be seeking other’s affirmation of you. I see you. Stop serving expecting something in return- EVERYTHING HAS ALREADY BEEN GIVEN TO YOU THROUGH THE SACRIFICE OF MY SON... and when that sinks in, you’ll realize that serving me and only me is the only natural response.
• I’m confused, uncertain, or frustrated. It’s not about you and your comfort or your circumstances- it’s about you trusting me with everything, especially the things you don’t understand, because I’m worth it. I shouldn’t have to continue to “bless you” to prove my trustworthiness to you. Just look at the cross- my sacrifice should silence all of your doubts and remind you (time and time again) that that “trust” has already been gained. Live like you trust me.
• I don’t want to call them out, I’m afraid they’ll misunderstand me and be ‘offended.’ 
• Do you love me more than these? Feed my sheep. 
• Do you love me? Feed my sheep.
• Do you love me? Feed my sheep.

Not only would this be a game-changer in how we tackle circumstances and live life, but it’d be a game-changer in how we love the One who gave it all.  

If you’ve been around the contemporary Christian circle for the past few years, you’ve probably heard of the book, Love Does. It’s a beautifully written book with the biblical concept that love is an action... it moves... it does something.... I just finished reading it and though I completely echoed everything it expressed, I couldn’t help but feel heartbroken. I’m heartbroken because people are thinking that this is a new and radical concept... when the reality is that over 2,000 years ago a man name Jesus lived out the concept of “love does” by DYING for us, and has been calling us to do the same ever since: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” MOVE. DO SOMETHING.

Every single day, but ESPECIALLY the past few weeks, I’ve been feeling like such a mess. It’s hard sometimes to not feel like a mess and failure when the Lord reveals our dirty sin over and over in our hearts.

But guess what? Not only am I a mess, but I like being a mess.   

I like being a mess because it’s in my mess- it’s in my brokenness- that Christ, in His unrelenting nature, molds and breaks my heart to look more like His own- and that’s beautiful.

What a beautiful mess we are,

em